What's your legacy???

Long long ago, in a place far far away, I was working with an ex colleague (Lets call him Dondu). Dondu had put in his resignation. While we were working on one of the reports, I noticed that Dondu was completing his work very fast, I got a bit suspicious and asked him whether he was actually checking the reports to see if they were coming correctly.
Dondu coolly replied - "Who cares, its my last week, even if they are wrong, I'll be long gone from this god forsaken place"

In a week's time, Dondu was relieved from his duties. A few months later, guess what --- the mess surfaced...
We spent over two weeks correcting what Dondu had left behind... Even to this day I remember what he had "Left Behind"


At another time, I went to a friend's house. He was shifting out of his apartment and going abroad. He had sold his apartment and was just there to pick up the remaining stuff. As we were in the lift, he threw the gum he was chewing in the lift itself... I told him it was unhygienic. He just replied that he wasn't going to come back anyways... so how did it matter.


Once my dad took me to a wildlife sanctuary. I was probably 8 or 10 years that time. We had ice creams and once I had finished I just tossed the empty ice cream cup nearby. Although there was a dust bin nearby, I just threw it nearby.
My dad noticed and said something which changed my life forever... "Tu saala Indian ka Indian hi rahega... jahan jayega... kachra failaiga..."
("You'll stay a **$#@* Indian all your life... leaving garbage behind wherever you go")

I felt very bad... My ego was seriously hurt. Yes... I was 10, but I still felt humiliated. I walked back, took that cup and went all the way to the dustbin to throw it in the bin.

Just so you know, my Dad is more Indian than most of us, but that comment that day had a purpose behind it.
I decided that I will change the meaning of being an Indian. I decided that I will make sure that every place I have been to should be clean after I have left. I have not littered for more than 22 years now. Not even a chocolate wrapper on the road side.


I was out shopping the other day and a girl walked up to me. She came up to me and said "Hi Gulshan Sir, recognize me?"
Obviously I didn't recognize her and I told her honestly that I wasn't able to place her face. She said that she was my student 5 years ago. I used to take a little extra something after every class and this girl remembered those extra snippets I taught. She told me how much difference my way of teaching had made in her life, both the academic aspect and otherwise.
It felt really great, especially because I myself never realized the value of what I was doing back then.


In every single thing I do, whether I'm working, sitting with family, with friends, having fun, on the road, in the mall, in the park... Wherever I am, I'm leaving something behind.
What I leave behind will stay there. It will have an impact. It will be my reminder. It will either help someone or disturb someone.

When I work and leave, I'm leaving my results behind.
When I teach and leave, I'm leaving my knowledge behind.
When I'm littering, I'm leaving garbage behind.
When I'm angry, I'm leaving disturbance behind me.
When I share a joke, I'm leaving smiles behind.
When I leave home, I'm leaving a hug and love behind.
When I pray and leave, I'm leaving gratitude behind.
When I'm writing, I'm leaving my learnings behind.

Whatever I leave behind will have an impact on those who come after me.
Whatever I leave behind is what I will be remembered for.
Whatever I leave behind is going to be my legacy...

It is entirely upto me on what I leave behind... It is entirely my choice to decide what the world will remember me for after I'm gone.

I will make sure that when I'm gone, everyone behind me will remember me only for the right reasons. For the value I added to their life.

I will make sure I leave behind a legacy. A legacy that will be valued. A legacy I will be remembered for...

The "I" here is not just for the writer of this blog... the "I" here represents each and every one who is reading this blog.

What are you leaving behind???
What's your legacy???

Think About It...

Life - Tests, Choices and Lessons...

I had a recent experience and it was so profound that I felt like sharing with everyone. Honestly, there couldn't have been a better way to come back to blogging after such a long break.

Here it goes...

Dondu and Pandu are friends.
Pandu also has another friend Golu.
Golu has never met Dondu.
One day, Life decided to test these three.

Morning 10 am - Dondu has been very ill and needs a blood donor. Dondu's parent's and loved ones are worried sick and trying everything to find a matching donor.

Sometime in the morning - Pandu started looking for a donor.

Afternoon 4 pm - Golu saw Pandu's message and offered to help.

Evening 6 pm - Golu was able to reach the hospital in time and luckily he matched the requirements.

Evening 9 pm - Donation procedure has been completed and everyone's relieved that things will start getting better now. Pandu and Golu are not able to meet Dondu since its already too late so they decide to leave for the day. Pandu is just worried that Golu might be a bit woozy after the whole process of blood donation.

Night 10 pm - Pandu drops Golu midway home to make sure he's fine. Golu reaches home and once they chat up with each other, they both go to bed.

Next day - Dondu is already on the way to recovery.

3 days later - Dondu is home and fine. He still hasn't met Golu, so he calls Golu to thank and now they are both good friends. Everyone is grateful to Pandu and Golu.

By now, word has spread in the whole friends circle and everyone is impressed with Golu. Everyone has appreciated Golu for the way he responded.
Golu's chin has been up ever since and his chest size has gone up by a few inches (with pride).

Nice story right? Short and sweet with a happy ending... right?

Well, this is where the learnings start...

1. First, I realised that fact that what is seen is noticed. The fact that Golu was able to leave things and respond very quickly was straightaway noticed by everyone. As a result, he was appreciated well in the friends circle.
Interestingly, Pandu did not receive as much accolade even though he was instrumental in mobilising donors, spent the whole day in the hospital, left business work, and not only that, he even made sure that Golu reached home safely. This was known only to the 2-3 people who were involved from start to end.
As a result, only those limited people were able to appreciate how much Pandu had actually contributed.
Moral of the story --- Whether good or bad, people will notice only if they are able to see it happen. This holds true in every aspect of life. Your boss will be able to notice your work only if you show him the results. Even your spouse will appreciate your love only if you are able to show it every now and then - flowers, chocolates, good meal, help in the kitchen etc.

2. Second, I realised that Pandu played a very important role in Dondu's life that day. He was there as a friend and did everything he could to help when Dondu needed him.
Similarly, Golu was able to make himself available and help Pandu when Pandu needed someone to help. This cycle goes on. Each one of us plays these 2 roles in life.
The question you need to ask yourself is - Do you have atleast one such friend in your life who will do for you what Pandu was able to do for Dondu? Do you have that one person you can count on in time of need. If you have not been able to earn atleast one such friendship, something needs to be corrected in your life. Do you have that "Special Friend"?
The More important question you need to ask is - Have you ever been such a person when your friend can count on you. Have you been that "Special Friend" to someone? If not, do you have someone about whom you care enough that when the time comes, you will become that Special Friend?
I have lived a good life if I have that "Special friend" and I am a "Special Friend" to someone...

3. Third, beware of pride.
That day, Pandu was in the right place at the right time. It could have been anybody else but Life chose Pandu as the right person to be there.
Similarly, Golu happened to be in the right place at the right time and the right match. He could have been anywhere in the world but Life chose to have him in the same city just a half hour drive away.
Pandu and Golu need to realise that they are just tools used by Life to take care of Dondu (Very precious tools indeed... but still tools of Life). It is not correct for them to think that its their credit. They just did the right thing.
We cannot allow pride and ego to take up space in our minds, "Aham" as its called in Sanskrit.

4. And Finally, its all about choices. Both Pandu and Golu could have chosen to be anywhere else in the world. Pandu could have worked on a project all day long and be home for dinner with his wife. Golu could have been in his workplace haggling with clients. But, when Life's test came up, everything else seemed small and they both chose to help in every way they could.
If any one of them had chosen otherwise, this blog would not have happened.

Its our choices that make us who we are...

Think about it....

Make-up

Ok... before you think that I'm an MCP, let me clarify that this blog is not targeted towards any gender. I'm just trying to understand what goes through one's mind...

Those who are dark in complexion want to be white.
Those who are fair take sun baths to develop a tan.
Do you not like your own lips?
Do you not like your own eyes?
Do you not like your own hair?

Then, why you would want to apply an artificial colour on your lips and nails.
Why would you want to change the colour of your hair to anything other than the way its been given to you.
Why would you wear coloured lenses to change your eye colour.

I've known people who do not step out even to buy milk without wearing make up... and then there are female friends who I have known for years and still got shocked when I saw them without makeup some day.

We spend so much time worrying about our looks... obsessing in front of a mirror.
Can we not have an inner beauty which shows up on our face?

I'm not talking about becoming a renunciate and to stop caring about how you look.

We live in a world which judges us by our looks.

It is necessary to look smart at work, to look pretty on a date...

Can you be so healthy that your skin glows and you don't need make-up
Can you be so happy that your face looks good without make-up too
Can you drink so much water that your lips have that natural colour and don't need lip colour
Can you eat so healthy that your nails have that beautiful pink
Can you take pride in the greys up there... atleast what's left of them...

Can you live just a week without make-up??? Can you live a week without looking at a mirror and still be confident about how you look?
We all love ourselves... but the answer to this question will tell you how much you love yourself as you are...

Think about it...

Lets decide the "What"

Let’s play this little game of imagination.

Imagine that you are the CEO of a big multinational company with 500 employees. One day, an office boy comes to you and asks for your time to discuss something very important. Obviously you have a large organization to run and the office boy may not be your top priority. But, being a good CEO, you will make a provision in your time and meet him later.

Now, let’s imagine that the office boy wants to meet you immediately and is adamant about it. He even offers to get you a box of chocolates. You still don’t agree to meet him immediately because you obviously have more priorities. Next, he offers you a cut from his salary so that you meet him immediately.

By now, you are laughing at this guy.

What on earth is he thinking? Trying to pay you a cut from the salary you pay him. If you had a choice, you would have met him on your own time, but because the office boy was pushing so hard, you may actually decide not to meet him at all… Am I right???

Now, Imagine that you are the CEO of a company which has billions of employees and each one of them has a demand on your time. You are a good boss and you want to meet each one of them. Do you think its possible to meet them at the time of their choice??

Obviously not…

You will have to plan your time and meet them as per your schedule. Right??

So, effectively, you allowed them to decide “What” they want, and you are willing to give it, but you will decide “When” to give as per your schedule.

Let me remind you that you and I are still humans.

We as humans are willing to give what the other person wants but we want to decide when to give it, then why can’t we accept this as a fact when it’s time for us to ask.

Why do we have to behave like that office boy and make unreasonable demands and want them fulfilled now?

Every time we make a wish, we want it fulfilled now. We are willing to make deals and proposals to Him in our prayers to make sure it happens “Now”…

That’s not how the system works. Every wish that I make, every thought that I release, every desire that I have, will be fulfilled, but it will take time.

I wanted to marry that girl, so I released a thought, problem is that I wanted to marry her immediately... That’s not gonna happen.

So life took its time and when the timing was right, we got married.

After watching so many Lara Croft movies, you want to marry Angelina Jolie.

There’s just a small glitch, about a million other people want that too, she is already married and has a dozen kids, and she’s about 20 years older to you.

So, does that mean it’s never going to happen?

Let me give you the good news…

I’m a strong believer in the Cosmic Conspirer’s System and I’m telling you that it will happen. Not today, not tomorrow, maybe not in this lifetime, but it will happen.

“He” needs time to move things around and fulfil your wish. Out of personal experience, I can say that it will happen. (okay. . . it wasn’t Angelina Jolie for me, but you got the point).

I have learnt that I just need to decide the “what” and He will decide the “when”…

Real misery happens when we try to decide the “what” and the “when”. And when things don’t happen as her our time, we become miserable…

You are trying to clear that professional exam and somehow things don’t work out, you become miserable.

You want that promotion, and for some reason you didn’t get it this year, you become miserable.

Wouldn’t life be more peaceful if you could just tell yourself, maybe it was not the right time and continue striving for it?

But Be Careful….

I’m not asking you to develop a defeatist attitude and give up. You can’t say this to your boss that “the timing for completion of the project was not right’’. He’ll probably kick you out of the office.

Where “Effort” is required, put in the necessary efforts…. Make sure you have done everything you can and then wait for the result… Be patient… Don’t be disparate…

I’m just saying that everytime you fall, just get up, dust your pants and start running again.

Desperation is never the answer.

Let’s make this shift in our thinking process.

Lets decide the “What” and let Him decide the “When”. . .

How many Gods do you have?

I was recently talking to a friend who is not Indian. Somehow the topic got diverted to religion and here's what my friend said - "I never understand your religion, it looks like you guys have more gods in India than you have people... and you guys are over a billion and counting. What do you do with so many Gods? Don't you feel like consolidating??"

Well, what do you think my answer was... I know, your first guess is that it was another long lecture of Moral Science.
Well... for a change I kept it simple and just replied - "Well... thats India"

But today, I have a question to ask of you...
You agree that God is infinite... You also agree that as Humans, we are finite... The finite has been created by the infinite. Then how can the finite with its finite knowledge ever define the infinite into one single form?
What are we trying to achieve by saying that God is an entity with a form and a name?

We all agree that as kids (very little kids), we do whatever our elders say, we look up to them, we try to emulate them, we treat them as elders.
Don't you agree that not all elders are the same to us when we are kids. Some boys are closer to their moms and relate better with their moms. Some girls are closer to their dads. I was very close to my grandma, but whenever I wanted something, I would get close to my grandpa.

Can we create a rule that all the kids in the world should always only listen to their dads? No...
Kids will always relate to elders like whom they want to be. They try to copy the elders they look up to. Kids try really hard not to disappoint their favourite elders.

I know what you are thinking...What does this have to do with a billion gods?

It does.

As humans, we are unique independent characters. We have different preferences, we like different things, we love different people, we fear different things. On the same basis, each one of us could feel connected to a different symbol of faith.
For example, my grandma was very interested in scriptures, she used to read Bhagavat Gita very regularly, so obviously, she felt more connected to Krishna, so she used to Worship Krishna. A friend of mine is a very timid guy, doesn't want to hurt others, somehow he can connect better with Lord Mahaveera. My mom looks up to Goddess Lakshmi, Goddess of wealth and fortune. I'm a simple guy and trust people very easily, I used to feel especially connected to Lord Shiva, so I grew up worshiping Lord Shiva.

How I wish that every one of us including I could transcend these forms. If only we could realise the fact that the God is a Force. Indescribable, Indestructible, Infinite... how could we even try to describe this Force into a single form?

When we worship these different forms, we are only worshipping an extension of something within us. When we worship the 9 forms of the Goddess, we are just looking up to the various aspects of ourselves. When we worship Goddess Lakshmi, we are just looking up to our desire for prosperity. When we worship Lord Shani, we are looking up to our own desire to be disciplined and so on.

My friend had no idea how correct he was when he made that statement. Just one correction. The number of Gods in India is not more than the people in India, its exactly the same. We have exactly the same number of Gods as the number of people in India.
We identify ourselves with one of the forms of that Force and each one of us is capable of eventually transcending that form to embrace the formless. I know that in this lifetime, that day will come. A day when numbers and names of God won't matter. A day when that Force will be a reason for unity among people. That day, no one will ask the question about god.

Have you identified your God yet?

Jo Dikhta hai...

I recently saw an advertisement on TV where people are buying stuff online and one of them doesn't trust it. So, one of the characters says "xxxx pe jo dikhta hai, wohi bikta hai". It means what is displayed is exactly what is sold to you.
All the credit for this sharing goes to the person who created this quote...

The amazing thing about language is that this same statement can be interpreted in a very different way...
Jo dikhta hai... wohi bikta hai...
What is displayed... is what is sold...
What is displayed....
Thats is what is sold...

So, if it is not displayed, it is not sold...

I used to work in a retail shop and the boss used to place very high importance on the display of the store...
He would pick out the best pieces himself and guide us to create the shop display... Interestingly, those would turn out the hottest selling items

Have you noticed one thing common across all the movie trailers... whether english or hindi movies... one thing is common across all trailers --- 90% of the best shots in the movie are shown in the trailers.

Even when you go for an interview, you wear your best shirt and tie...

One thing common across all this is to make sure that the best is at display...

What is displayed... is what is sold...
That which is displayed is sold...

Do you think it will make sense that I get the best merchandise in my shop but don't keep it on display???

Will it make sense that you have a strength but don't display it in the interview???

Now, once you have cracked the interview and got the job, do you still do it???

I have a friend who is a bit weak in accounts, so he went all the distance, did all the extra research just before the job interview and prepared his accounting knowledge as much as possible. Obviously, he got the job because he was able to display a strength in accounts on that day...
My question to him is - Now that you have the job, are you still putting the same effort???

Even in office, your boss will see the strengths which you display...
The work you get will be based on the strengths which you display...
You will get the next promotion... the next project... the next client.... based on the strengths which you have displayed....

I'm a complete show off.... But right now I'm not talking about showing off...
Showing off is different from displaying the strengths...

You have been in a job for the last 1 / 2 / 5 / 10 / 15 years... are you displaying your strengths in the same way as you did on day 1??? Are you demonstrating capabilities... leadership... ownership???

Tomorrow is the start of a new week for most of us...
Lets start the week with this mantra...
That which is displayed... is sold...
Jo dikhta hai... wohi bikta hai...

"L" Board

I learnt to drive a car quite a few years ago. Last year, we bought a car in the family and I was expected to drive it. There was just this one small issue - I had not driven a car in 6 years, and never driven one on the main roads by myself.
In India, we have a concept of placing a big red "L" on the front and rear windshields. This is to let the people around know that the driver is still learning and should be given more space.
People on the road tend to be a little less rude to "L" board drivers.
At first I pasted the "L" board for the benefit of surrounding traffic. It's been close to 5000 kilometres and I still have the "L" board on.
Somehow, I don't feel like removing it. There's so many things I need to learn about driving.

I just realised, that's the case with almost everything in my life.
Till yesterday evening, I was one of the best in my office. Today morning I walked into a classroom as a student and woke up to a fact that there were 83 better than me sitting inside that classroom alone (I'm not even talking about the whole world... just inside that class)
I just realised how much more there is to learn... and how ridiculously less I know.

Thankfully, I'm taking steps necessary to move towards better knowledge levels.

Problem is - I took the steps after an idle time of almost 8 years.

My question to you is - Are you continuously learning???
Have you kept the student alive in you???
Is you ego feeding you with an illusion that you know everything???
Forget about big things...
What is a new thing you learnt today?
What was a new thing you learnt this week?
What was something new you learnt this month?
Heck... Have you learnt anything new in the last one year???
When was the last time you learnt anything new and useful???

These were the questions haunting me and I have made a conscious decision to keep the "L" board up for a long long time... not just on my car but in my life as well.

Is your "L" board up???