Ego

When I say "I Can Do It", thats confidence
When I say "ONLY I can do it", thats ego

When I say "I am Right" and its based on my knowledge, thats confidence
When I say "I can't be wrong", thats ego

When I try to show that I'm on the right track, thats persistence (applicable only in professional life, in relationships, it doesn't matter who is right, what matters is who cares more for the relationship.)
When I try to prove that the other person is wrong, thats ego

On realising my mistake, if I accept it, thats humility
Even after realising my mistake, if I don't accept it, thats ego

When I respect a system and follow it, thats discipline
When I go against the system just for the sake of it, thats ego

When I don't hesitate to learn something new from my juniors, thats my thirst for knowledge
When I don't learn from someone just because that person is below me in ranks - Thats ego

When I say "I have done it, you too can do it", thats good leadership
When I say "I have done it, but you can't", thats ego

Confidence, persistence, humility, discipline, thirst for knowledge, leadership are what I need to move ahead.
Ego is the guaranteed first step to the endless road downhill.

Strangers

What an Experience...
I'm on my way back after a short stint on a project away from home.
The day we walked into the client's office, we knew only a couple of people, that too by their voices. For the first 3-4 days, I was actually struggling with remembering the names of the team members (yes, I am bad with remembering names), then some of the guys came forward, suggested places to visit, we shared a few jokes and before we knew, we were no longer strangers.
It has been four months now and the kind of comfort we had can be seen in the fact that our goodbyes were really long. We parted with momentoes, memories, lovely cards signed and written with nice messages. We parted being more than just client and service provider.
Of course the professionalism has been maintained, results delivered, discussions and arguments had and all the regular client vendor stuff happened. That cannot be compromised.
That apart, the way I get to know my colleagues on the project changed hugely. Having worked for a couple of years, we grew to know each other much better in these 4 months than in the last couple of years.
Now, lets look back at some of the other relationships we have, there are a few people whom we have known for a few years now. How comfortable are we with them?
I may not be so comfortable with my mom & dad as I am with my brother. I may not be as comfortable with my brother as I am with my friend.
Who exactly is a stranger?

Just Ask

I have been a strong believer in this one method of finding answers. Whenever I'm stuck with a question and I'm not able to find an answer even after spending some time on it, I catch hold of someone with a better understanding and talk it out with that person.
The question could be personal, professional, religion, life, anything.
The best part is that when I'm having such discussions, I quite often end up finding the answer myself. The solution need not come from the other person, but while I explain the question, I see things differently. This seeing differently often allows to see an answer which was not there earlier.
This does not mean one should become totally dependent on others and go running to others for help every time one has a problem. That will only stop one's growth.
When I'm using MS Excel and I need a formula, I won't go running to my boss  or colleagues immediately. I will try to find the answer myself, read the help file, search online, come with atleast one possible answer.
And then, after putting in reasonable time and effort, if I'm not happy with the solution, I'll go and run through the solution with my boss or some colleague.
On the other hand, I can't spend a week trying to find an answer. That just might be too late.
If I'm cooking and not sure about how much salt to add, I can't keep thinking for 20 minutes on how much salt to add, if I wait too long, I'll end up with coal flavoured food. I just call my mom and check with her.
There has to be a balance which I need to maintain and it depends on the urgency of the question.
The normal rule I follow in my professional and personal life is that if I'm not able to find an answer and I'm stuck in a single place for more than 10 minutes, I should consider asking for help.
It doesn't have to be the complete answer, just a guidance, a line of thought, an idea is all that's needed. Most of us are able to pick from there.
So many times it happens that we spend a considerable amount of time on a problem, go ask someone, and it turns out that it was a very small issue which could have been resolved in 2 minutes max.
Whenever you find yourself in that place, all you need to do is Just Ask...

Wants and Needs

Have been trying to make a few decisions for the last few months. There are a lot of activities to do and a lot of things to invest in, but not all of them are equally important. So there is definitely some scope for choosing what comes first and what can wait. I normally prefer to talk through most of my decisions with a friend.
This friend always helps me to make my decisions, and the best part is that I always end up answering only one question to my friend. This one question is almost always enough to help me decide.
Its only now that I'm learning to use one question as a powerful tool. The question is "Do I Want it or Do I Need it?"
I have owned a Pulsar 150cc bike for many years and honestly it is the best bike I have ever driven, but I have been eyeing the newer 220cc upgraded version... Do I need it or do I want it?
I have a HCL netbook computer, but I've been eyeing a Macbook Air for quite some time.... Do I need it or do I want it?
Every summer there is power cuts in my neighbourhood and I've been wanting to install a power backup system in the house... Do I need it or do I want it?
New furniture or holiday abroad?
New watch or a microwave?
New bike or new car?
Sedan or Hatchback? or SUV?
Cheese burger or homemade food?
Most of us mix up the wants and the needs and give a greater importance to our wants while making decisions.
Everytime that we find ourselves saying that "I should have done this instead of this", chances are that when we gave a preference to wants instead of needs while making a decision, .
I have been asking this question a lot to myself recently... everytime I want something, I ask myself "Do I want it or do I need it?"
After all the needs have been satisfied, I can always make room for the wants...

Think about it...