As your SOW so you reap

Yep... you read it right... and no... there is no typo error either...
The title is exactly what I wanted to type...
As your SOW... so you reap...
SOW stands for "Start Of Week"

I was about to share this learning last Sunday but somehow I didn't. It so happened that I left my house last Monday in a less than happy mood and somehow every activity I took up during the week was getting completed but not in a good mood.
The last week only strengthened my faith in my belief...
My Teacher has taught me - "The Belief you hold at the beginning of the journey defines the journey"
I'm a strong believer in this one single statement and the ones close to me have seen this in my personal mails as a signature.
This statement came to me through my teacher somewhere in December 2009 and since then it turned my life around. All I had to do was adopt this statement as a thinking process and 2 and half years later this has become my second nature.
Very often, we begin our journey the wrong way... Monday morning is the best example I can think of right now.
We are starting off a new week tomorrow morning... Lets just do this small test...
Answer my questions honestly...
What is your thought process when you get up on a Monday morning?
What are you thinking when you get into your office on Monday morning?
Most of us... including me... are clearing up the backlog of previous Friday on the Monday morning. We could have easily sat for an extra 15 minutes on Friday evening and finished it up.

Infact these Monday morning symptoms are so strong, that we have even invented the term... "Monday Morning Blues"...
What I don't understand is how could someone be anything less than 100% on a Monday morning after 2 full days of recharge period. (unless you are doing some energy expenditure over the weekend)

Lets do this experiment and have a powerful start for our Monday tomorrow morning. After all, even our elders used to say the same thing... we just found a new meaning for it...

As your SOW... So you reap...
As your (Start Of Week)... so you reap... (the fruits of the week...)

Think about it...

Have a fantastic week ahead...

A Hundred Miles Travelled...

A hundred miles travelled…

A thousand seeds sown…

I know not which ones sprouted…

Alas… it shall never be known…

I do know that I did what I was meant to do

Maybe I took along a few fellow travelers too…

With Gratitude in my heart,…

I pray to that One force…

Let me just be the tool and You should be the source…

This is the hundredth sharing since I started writing this blog. Over this time a lot of learning has happened through life and whatever contributed to my growth became a sharing in this blog.

I do not know how many people have read the posts, which post clicked for you,  which one made a difference to you and which one was totally illogical, maybe a bit too extreme… (then again, those who know me well know that quite a few things I do border towards extreme)

What I do know is that it is never possible to make everyone happy. I just need to be myself, it may make some happy, it may make others not so happy.

Then again, I’m yet to meet someone who has the secret to make everyone happy.

What’s important for me is that atleast one person grew from every post that came through me. Atleast one person was never the same as before, after reading a sharing. If that has happened, I think the efforts have paid off…

There have been quite a few places where the sharings received encouraging feedback and some places where I got corrected…

Wherever I was able to touch your heart, my communication was clear and good. Wherever you think that I have not said something correct… it only means that I need to work more on the way I put things across…

I think this is a good time to share some of the nice comments which I have received over time…

So here we go…

http://gulshanseeks.blogspot.com/2012/04/cost-of-smile.html

-       This blog made me smileJ

http://gulshanseeks.blogspot.com/2011/12/alcohell.html

-      Little too extremist! Aren’t a few things made for adults, why to talk about kids consuming them? Everything in limited quantity is acceptable till one doesn’t end up being slave of same. Control lies in knowing how much can one handle and then abiding by the same…

http://gulshanseeks.blogspot.com/2011/12/did-i-say-that.html

-       your blogs are also as sweet as u… keep the good work going

http://gulshanseeks.blogspot.com/2011/11/my-anchor.html

-       interesting… ur blogs are going on different level

-       very true!! Rock on with your thinking hat!

http://gulshanseeks.blogspot.com/2011/10/strangers.html

-       stranger is none other than “MYSELF”

http://gulshanseeks.blogspot.com/2011/10/just-ask.html

-      Guls… rightly said… u need to have the urge to ask if you are in search of a solution… do not worry if the one you are asking is either a senior or junior… what matters is the answer / solution… This is what I have learnt from my previous Boss AJD… and Guls you will agree that you too have learnt this at AJD.

http://gulshanseeks.blogspot.com/2011/10/wants-and-needs.html

-       Life is definitely not about needs! Its about getting what you want

-       Guls… in such situations what I do is I analyse whether it is necessary to buy or not. I always buy or invest in something only when there is a need for it and not just because I like something. People do call me “kanjoos”… but that is how I am.

http://gulshanseeks.blogspot.com/2011/09/teacher.html

-       Good one I agree with you on this and dedicate the link to all my teachers as well

-       Good one dear… once again txs for your greetings and reminding me to wish my teacher and mentor… it was a great feeling when I received a reply from him… txs dude keep it up…

-       To the teachers over the world!!!

http://gulshanseeks.blogspot.com/2011/08/my-share.html

-       very nice… the best one so far.

http://gulshanseeks.blogspot.com/2011/06/train-journey.html

-       Even I wonder ‘where are you from’… ET?? Good one dear.!

http://gulshanseeks.blogspot.com/20110/11/behind-every-successful-man-there-is.html

-       very true… keep writing such facts about life…

http://gulshanseeks.blogspot.com/2010/10/that-feeling-of-sometimes-i-just-hate_28.html

-       nice post… a good food for thought for people running aimlessly through jobs!

http://gulshanseeks.blogspot.com/2012/05/for-time-being.html

(this comment is from a person who is an expert on Organisational Behaviour)

-      We need to work on communication at different levels in the organization. We take it for granted. We also assume so many things and don’t bother to check these assumptions. Many problems can be prevented if we do so. We need to develop courage to ask relevant and pertinent questions, but we have to dare to ask a question to ourselves – why Im am doing whatever I am doing? Thanks for the wake up call.

http://gulshanseeks.blogspot.com/2011/03/new-beginnings.html

-      This was nice. Reading between the lines it gives us quite a few messages. If one can stick to this, there can never be breakdowns in relationships. So nice of you to express like this. Keep it up.

These are just some of the responses I received through emails and facebook in addition to the ones already posted as comments on the respective blogs…

This is just those who chose to express… there must be many more…

Like I said in the beginning…  I do not know which of the seeds sown through me have borne what fruit to you…

Forever in Gratitude…

I'll answer your question but...

Recently I was having a chat with my friend and my friend asked me a question "Gulshan, even I want to stay always motivated and energetic like you, how can I do it? Whats your secret?
(yes... a few people actually think that I'm always motivated and energetic)
I almost answered his question but stopped in time. I asked him a question in return. I asked him -
"I will give you the answer... I'll tell you exactly what I do to stay active and motivated... but on one condition... Will you do exactly what I tell you to? Follow the exact steps?"

As expected, my friend rolled his eyes... gave an innocent puppy smile and said... "Well....."

I didn't give him the answer.

You know why?

He asked the question but did he really intend implement the answer?

A lot of people come for free advice... How do you stay so fit? How can you do this? How can you do that?

Earlier I used to be very excited to answer... but over a period of time I realised that the answers I give would not be used and become a matter of gossip behind my back...

We keep asking so many trivial questions - How do I increase my memory? How do I increase my concentration? How do I get fit? Do you think Ravana was really that bad? etc etc.

Be honest... you also would have asked such questions at some time in your life. I definitely have.
Did you get answers?
How many answers did you implement?

We keep asking all sorts of questions without any intention... correction... without any serious intention to implement them.
Infact some characters ask questions just for the sake of asking and don't even wait for the complete answer before moving on to the next topic...
Its nothing but a wastage of our time and others'.

Thats why I decided that whenever someone asks me a question for which I know the answer but I don't feel that person will implement the answer... I ask upfront... "I'll give you the answer but will you implement it?"
Generally its a pretty good way to understand whether the other person will respect the answer coming through me...

Split - Part 3

Please read this sharing with the understanding that I do not tell what to do... I just share what I do...
Got a few interesting comments on the earlier two sharings and you guys have asked me the exact questions for which I was planning to give the answers. So I figured that's the best place to start...


Comment 1 -
Agreed Gulshan completely the world will be a better place if these personalities were even.
Now one question yo have probably pointed out some cases let me ask a few questions
If u feel offended (small petty personal/corporate issue) by someone do you point it out the same way if he/she is
a. family
b. friend
c. colleague
d. boss
e. big boss
f. stranger


Answer:
First of all, my answer won't change based on whether it was personal or corporate issue. That is where the biggest split happens. If I'm not ok with something I have only 2 options - Either remove the problem or remove myself from there.
So, if someone has offended me, whether I will correct that person? - Yes... definitely yes... no split there.
Whether I will correct all of them in the same way? - No.
I know what you are thinking... Gotcha!!! even gullu has a split... let me just deviate with an example...
When I hug my wife... I get a smooch in return...
When I hug my sister... I get a peck on the cheek...
When I hug my mom... I get one on the forehead...
If I hug a female colleague... I'll probably get a sexual harassment policy slapped on me...
I don't even want to imagine what happens if I hug a stranger lady on the road...

If a positive hug needs to be handled delicately... just imagine what it would be when you have to give a negative feedback.
What we need to understand is that all of us share an emotional account with each other and how I receive your feedback will be very different from how your own wife would receive.
Correcting my family is the most important thing for me... correcting a stranger is the least...

Comment 2 - 
In my opinion we have a lot of corporate rules, that forces us to behave differently with different people.
We tend to behave nicely with boss as he will appraise us.
We tend to behave competitively with collegue as we are competing for that share of increment
I hope we will be able to collect the courage to move way from these splits and lead a transperent life.

Answer:
For starters, I don't believe that corporate rules force us to behave differently with different people. I just need to go to office, do my work, lead my team, be led by my team leader, update my reports and head back home.
Actually I am probably the most improperly behaving guy in the whole team even when the boss is around. And I have a habit of sharing anything new I learn with all my colleagues. I know that even if I share all that I know I will still be able to maintain enough edge to get my increments.
Problem happens - Split happens only over the coffee breaks when we speak about our seniors or juniors in their absence.

Comment 3 - 
Gulshan I agree that we do have splits.
I have adopted these splits to reduce fights in my personal relationship.
I have also adopted some of these splits in my professional life for visibility of my work and task.
At the core of my heart i know that this is manipulation and manipulation does not have longer life.
Is there a way we can get away from these splits?

Answer:
I had once given an answer to do a mirror test. Today its one more test... If you can look into the eyes of your loved one and hold that gaze... you don't have a split.
(Gulshan - why do you have a fixation on eyes??? Well... I am a strong believer in the power of eyes.)
Visibility in work place can be best achieved by work...
If I ever find out that a person manipulated me, I would not trust that person again.


Do you remember the last time you had to speak a lie. Remember how you had to keep a track of 2 different stories at the same time and keep remembering which one to tell to whom?
We are doing the same thing unconsciously by having splits.
Trick is to be consciously aware when the tongue and intentions are out of alignment.

A lot of theory / philosophy / gyan can be discussed here, but I think the answers that have come here through for the above 3 comments are much better than what I could have written myself.

If there are any questions unanswered... answer just might come through me at sometime... someday...