Sangham Sharanam Gachhami…

Just recently I realized how much impact the company one keeps can have on one’s personality..

Sangham Sharanam Gachhami… This is the last line of a 3 line prayer having its origins in Buddhism. Literally translated, it simply means – I go towards the accompaniment (of wise men).

I have always loved to crack jokes and my jokes are generally the clean ones which you can share with your mom and sister. However, there was a time when I used to share and enjoy the “not so clean” jokes as well but that was long long ago and with a very different set of friends. Recently, I shared a few of “those” old jokes with my friends and they were quite surprised to hear them from me… “Gulshan… you have changed… you have grown up…”  etc and such other responses. Looking back I realized that I had started relating with my earlier set of friends which was bringing back the earlier, ordinary class habits to me.

At another point, I had unknowingly picked up the word “Raja” (meaning king) in my conversations, I would address anybody and everybody as Raja. Do this Raja, don’t do that Raja and so on. Again, a friend pointed out to me and asked where I had picked this habit. I realized that my boss used this word a lot and unknowingly I had picked it up from him.

Back in school days, I had started speaking wrong language after I moved to a new school. Almost every sentence would start with “Saale” (a slang word). Now looking back at it I realize that the set of friends I had in the new school were used to that kind of language and I had picked it up.

Infact, its not just about language. One of my friend had a habit of winking slightly whenever he spoke and a few months later I had my mom asking my why I was winking while talking.

There was this one character in my very early jobs who always used to crib about everything. Over time I had my boss asking my why I was becoming so negative in my approach.

This is true with every aspect of my life. When with irritating people, I start getting irritated; when with gloomy people, I find it difficult to be happy; when with happy people, I feel happier; when with smart people, I feel I’m working much more efficiently; when with punctual people, I am punctual and so on….

Irrespective of how strong I am personally, the company I keep will eventually start having its effects… both positive and negative.

Maybe it is a weakness, maybe it’s a strength. But all I know is that my "Sangham" has a huge impact on my personality and character.

Sangham Sharanam Gachhami…

This statement is much more powerful that it looks. It is true in both directions, When I am in a good sangham, I grow. When I am in ordinary sangham, I continue to live an ordinary life.

I guess the best way to use this understanding in my favour is to be in the best possible company. I maintain a company of smart, efficient, knowledgeable people, if nothing else, I’ll probably land up being half as good as them. The chances of growth for me are definitely much better that way when compared to keeping ordinary company.

This post is not just about me, try to replace me with yourself and you just might find it completely applicable to you as well.